Category: Healing (Page 2 of 4)

Maybe Forgiveness isn’t for You

forgiveness

A common teaching I hear, in my Christian circles, about forgiveness is that it is primarily intended to benefit the person extending it. The understanding is that when we forgive we free ourselves from anger and hurt. Or that forgiveness eliminates barriers between us and God. While I don’t disagree, I have found forgiveness to offer much more than we have come to expect.

The more I study the Bible and meditate on what Jesus said, and how He operated; the more I’m convinced we have an incomplete view of forgiving. In fact our common understanding may actually be a skewed view of the intention of forgiving.

70 times 7

When we see forgiveness in the bible, it always seems to benefit the one being forgiven more than it does the one doing the forgiving. And it is always extended beyond what we would deem acceptable. We see this when Jesus says to forgive 70×7 (Matt 18:21-22). It seems that in forgiving we are to extend God’s grace and mercy and pave the way for the person to come to God. The bible makes it seem as though forgiveness is always for the other person.

In every biblical reference I have read, it always benefits the one being forgiven. To be clear, I am not discounting the benefits we enjoy when we forgive. Forgiveness is an essential part of the internal healing process when someone was hurt. I also know that when you have been really hurt, and I mean devastated, forgiveness can be a far off thing. At some point, and even for an extended time, it may seem as if forgiveness will never come. This article is in no way intended to discount those truths. However, I would like to challenge us all to consider a more Christ-centered experience of forgiveness.

Why Does God Forgive

Isaiah 43:25 says, “I, I am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake, and I will not remember your sins.” When we see verses like this it can seem like God is saying that His forgiveness is intended for His benefit. But, when you take the concept of forgiveness across the entirety of the Bible, the desire of God’s heart is to be with His creation. Having his creation reconciled with Him is the motivation for His forgiveness. Because God lacks nothing, and we lack all that is good, His forgiveness still ultimately benefits us, the Forgiven.

The forgiveness we see God display, through Jesus, is not one that releases Him from us, but rather creates a path to Him. He beckons us to reconciliation with Him. Is it possible the type of forgiveness we are called to offer provides this same level of grace and mercy and the same path for the the one who we forgive?

Forgive Without limits

In Matthew 18:21, when Peter asked Jesus how often we should forgive, he suggested seven times, offering what he presumed to be an amount that was full of grace. Jesus countered with “seven times seventy.” This was not Jesus placing an exact number or limit on us forgiving, but instead expressing that forgiving someone goes far beyond any limitations that we can or should imagine.

Biblical Forgiveness

What would happen if we fully embraced the Apostle’s call in Eph 4:32 and Col 3:13 to forgive others like God, through Jesus has forgiven us? What would happen if the forgiveness we offered others created a path to God and invited them to walk toward Him? Maybe we should stop treating forgiveness like it is intended to free ourselves and start treating it like it is intended to free others. Maybe then more people could see that we are offering them a taste of the much sweeter path to forgiveness that Jesus offers.

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photo credit: lifepalette.com

Worry Empties Your Today

Worry


Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.

~ Corrie ten Boom ~


As far back as I can remember, I have had a tendency to worry. It used to be to the point of creating excessive anxiety. Although I didn’t show it on the outside, inwardly I was a wreck.

Today, I am not driven to excessive worry. However, I can still get caught up in worrying about things that are presumably out of my control. If my worry only affected me, it would not be as big of an issue. Unfortunately worry, stress, and anxiety rarely only affect the person experiencing it.

Worry Seeps Out

Over the last few months I have been worrying about some real-life, adult stuff. I had mostly kept it at bay, but recently I started thinking on it to the point that it became overly stressful and started seeping into my outward behavior. I did not recognize this, but my wife did. That worry manifested itself in the form of being short with her. My wife began to worry I was possibly angry at or frustrated with her. I was not. My worries have nothing to do with her. Because we work hard at keeping our lines of communication open, she was able to bring it to my attention.

Any Excellence

The main thing my wife helped me realize during our conversation is how easily we are affected by what we choose to think about. I’m reminded of Paul’s exhortation of what we ought to think on. In Philippians 4:8 he urges, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” It is when we think on these things that God works the renewing of our mind. When we think on these things we are made more and more into the image of Christ. We become more able to deal with our concerns in healthier ways. As we think on these things, worry loses its power over us and we are able to depend more fully on God. Our focus becomes peace rather than worry. Paul concludes this thought by telling us that if we think on those things and “What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”

He Is Our Peace.

Isn’t that what we all want? Peace? When we worry, our attention is pulled away from God, our heart is dulled, and our peace is stolen from us. But, when we think on the good things of God, we will see clearly that He is with us. He is our peace.

Why Are So Many Christians Afraid of Being Broken?

Broken

 Today we welcome, Amazon Best Selling author, speaker and radio host, Matt Ham. Matt knows a thing or two about brokenness. In this article he shares what happens when we finally realize that we are broken.

The one constant that we all share is suffering. I wrestled with this for so long in my life, but a cancer diagnosis in 2014 awakened me to this reality.

For some reason suffering and brokenness have become four-letter words, especially in Western Christianity. While many of us understand that we live in an ugly, broken world, we’d rather not go there. In fact, we try our hardest to avoid brokenness and control our circumstances so that we can avoid pain.

But I’m learning something different:

The only path to true freedom is through the very brokenness that we so desperately want to avoid.

Two years ago, before my cancer diagnosis, if I were reading this post, I would have stopped reading by now. Quite frankly, it was a lot easier to avoid the conversation altogether. But I’m learning that for the brave, courageous few who are willing to continue, the reward is beyond comprehension.

Seeds Don’t Bear Fruit

Last fall, my wife and I took our three sons to an apple orchard in the mountains of North Carolina. In the cool fall air, we walked through the rolling hills and picked sweet fruit from the trees.

As I watched my sons enjoy the ripe apples, I thought about a consistent theme throughout the Bible. In countless parables and teachings, Jesus spoke of bearing fruit. He used analogies of seeds and soil and trees to convey some of His deepest truths.

In my own walk, I longed to bear fruit. I longed to see the fullness of God ripen within me to produce His very purpose for my life. But I believed that bearing fruit had to do with my own effort. I thought that striving and trying and willing myself to obedience was the path to wholeness—the path to fruitfulness.

But that day in the apple orchard, something deeper hit me: seeds don’t bear fruit.

Isn’t it interesting that a seed must surrender itself, it must be broken, in order to begin the process of fruit being born?

I feel like in using the analogies of nature, Jesus was trying to convey something much deeper than we want to understand. While religion calls us to bear fruit by our own effort, Jesus reminded us that fruit is born out of brokenness.

Curiously, He was willing to go as far as being broken himself—crucified, died and buried, so that the fruit of our salvation could be tasted. In that process, Jesus not only became our Savior, He became our example.

Recognize You’re Broken

The first step toward wholeness is the recognition that you’re broken. It sounds counterintuitive, but it’s absolutely true.

The first step in healing a marriage is an understanding that the marriage needs healing. The first step toward financial peace is financial unrest. The first step toward a healthy lifestyle is an acceptance that your current way of life is unhealthy. And the list goes on.

The same is true of our faith.

The problem is, so many of us are unwilling to go there—we’re unwilling to be broken.

Jesus struggled with that as well. If you remember, there was a moment, in Gethsemane, where Jesus had to make the choice to live out His own parables. As Jesus bled sweat from His forehead, He asked God if there was another way: “Abba, Father, do I have to be broken?

In that moment, Jesus prayed a prayer that terrifies me: “Father, not my will, but thine be done.

Being broken is about surrendering your will in exchange for the will of the Father. And that’s not just as a one-time, shot-in-the-bucket choice, it’s a constant state of being. That’s why Jesus said, “Take up your cross and follow me.” The good news is, we don’t have to hang on a cross. But we do have to pick one up.

The Sweet Fruit of Freedom

Our absolute surrender is the only thing strong enough to break the seed of pride within us. That is the path to bearing fruit. That is the path to living whole. Once we surrender our will in exchange for the Father’s, we begin to take root. Then, and only then, will His fruit come forth.

When my physical body had to be pierced in order to remove my cancer, I was reminded of the pierced hands and feet of my Savior. That was the only way that we could be freed.

Refusing brokenness is like holding on to the very cancer that threatens to destroy us.

I’m living proof that brokenness is the path to freedom. As upside-down as it sounds, it’s absolutely true. There is no other way.

But that freedom is the sweetest fruit I have ever tasted. And in God’s beautiful plan, that fruit produces seeds that, when broken, will yield more fruit. And more fruit. And more fruit.

That’s the beauty of the gospel.

In death we find life.

In brokenness we find healing.

When we are emptied, He makes us whole.


Matt HamMatt Ham is a dynamic storyteller and speaker seeking to challenge culture by challenging perspective. He is also the author of the Amazon Best Seller, Redefine Richco-host of the radio talk show, Wake Up Our Faith and host of Whole Life Matters podcast. You can follow Matt at his blog, or on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook or connect with him in the FB group, The Whole Life Community.

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