Category: Approach God (Page 5 of 18)

Transparency isn’t the best you have to offer.

Transparency

Transparency is often billed as on of the most important traits a leader can have. I mean, people like the Dalai Lama saying things like, “A lack of transparency results in distrust and a deep sense of insecurity.” How do you argue with the Dalai Lama? I assume if you tried, he might just hug you. The point being, if you were to ask any number of leaders what are the most important traits of leadership, odds are transparency would be on that list. But, I’m not convinced that transparency is the best that a leader has to offer. I’ll can take that a step further and say that I’m not even sure that transparency is the best you can offer to the community of people you’re doing life with.

When we talk about transparency there’s this idea that it means our life is completely open for others to observe and peer into. We also attach the idea of being completely honest with our thoughts, feelings, emotions and struggles. That transparency is supposed to extend to anyone who has even the slightest connection to you; if you’re a leader, that means any one that follows you. If you’re in community with others, that means everyone you “do” life with.  Leaders talk about the importance of transparency in community and then try to demonstrate it by example. Unfortunately, I know enough leaders to know that transparency is often more of a pipe dream than something that is actually fully practiced. But it isn’t for not wanting to. I think people know there is a benefit to allowing others equal access to the attractive and unattractive areas of their life. The problem is that fear of being hurt or taken advantage of is stronger than the desire for openness in our relationships. The truth is that sometimes there’s no benefit to either party in allowing that type of full access. So, we tell others how important transparency is, while hiding certain areas, and pretending that you’re living a life of full disclosure. That’s not the best. At the least it creates false closeness in our relationships. At the worst, it creates unrealistic expectations, setting people (leaders especially) on pedestals. When those expectations aren’t met, or a leader fails in an area, it’s devastating. Transparency forces you to say, “Everyone has access to every part. No matter how private or hurtful.” It removes that ability to differentiate the depths of our different relationships.

So, if transparency isn’t the best, what is? I’m going to say a word that no doubt has been over used in the past ten years; Authenticity. I know, I know. You’re mind probably just flashed to some saggy-beanie wearing, Christian hipster who’s sitting in a hole-in-the-wall coffee-house, drinking his reverse-drip, syphon-separated, goat-milk, half-caff, latte and talking about how he’s seeking an authentic faith in an authentic missional community of authentic believers pursuing authentic communal living. But, it’s overuse doesn’t diminish the truth of it’s importance. I think that authenticity trumps transparency every time. Authentic is simply being real, or genuine, with others. It doesn’t try to force you to open areas that you may not be ready to open. Authentic allows you to say, “I am deeply struggling with something, but it isn’t for you to know about. Instead, it’s reserved for two other people who are helping me walk through it.” Authenticity allows you to be honest with others, while still maintaining a wise level of privacy. Authenticity allows you the ability to be really real with everyone, while allowing you the freedom to cultivate depth in a few really important relationships. Authentic allows you to be open with those people who will help you grow and avoid openness with those that would just assume tear you down.

With that said, transparency isn’t useless and shouldn’t be abandoned. In systems and structures transparency is crucial. If you tithe to a church, 100% transparency in those financial records is necessary for accountability sake. Transparency in your mission as a community is equally necessary, because people should to be able to easily perceive the motives of your group. Transparency in your leadership building process allows people to know what to expect as you work through developing them. Transparency in the context of systems provides the ability for people joining you in community to see more clearly into what they’re joining. Transparency in structures and programs works far better than it does as a trait for a person.

When you shoot for authentic, you get the right amount of transparency with the right people.

Tweet: When you shoot for authentic, you get the right amount of transparency with the right people. | #ApproachGod http://ctt.ec/Udr4s+

If I’m being completely transparent here, we’re not going to ever be completely open to everyone, nor should we be, but we can be completely real with everyone. Some people won’t understand or accept that, but those are the people who solidify the argument that it doesn’t benefit everyone for you to give unfettered access to everyone. When you shoot for authentic, you get the right amount of transparency with the right people.

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Repost from Acuff.me || Communities make the world (and ideas) go round.

  I love community. It’s so important in so many facets of life’s. Here’s a great post from Jon Acuff.

Jon said…

I’ve written before about how chasing a dream is like being on an an island, and how eventually every island needs bridges, boats, and runways to be as awesome as it can be. In other words, every dreamer needs the support of a community. There’s no better example of that than the folks in the Dreamers…

http://acuff.me/2015/04/communities-make-the-world-and-ideas-go-round/

3 Things the Gospel Isn’t

FalseThis blog has been around for a few years. During those years, the structure and my writing style has change a few times but my heart for why #ApproachGod exists has remained the same. But, it wasn’t until recently that I started really being able to articulate what #ApproachGod is for. Here it is: I want #ApproachGod to encourage conversations that will help build communities that cultivate love, so that people can see that they’re invited, through Jesus, to approach God the Father. The most important part of building communities that reflect Jesus, is the Gospel Message. Actually, without understanding the Gospel Message, a love cultivating community that is pursuing Jesus, doesn’t exist. I think that a lack of understanding the Gospel is one of the main barriers keeping us from having genuine communities where people are loved to Christ.

I could just tell you what the Gospel message is, but where’s the fun in that. And, I’ve written that so many times (I’ll also include it at the end of this article). Here’s three things that we typically twist the Gospel message into, but that it is most definitely NOT

A Means to Condemn Others

We’ll start here, mainly because I constantly see articles and stories with Christians shouting about what others are doing that doesn’t line up with scripture. Right off the bat Jesus said, “For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.” In that passage of scripture Jesus is explaining God’s great love for the world and how He fits into it. He does say that those that don’t believe in Him are already condemned. The implication is that all of us are already condemned, but those that chose to believe that Jesus is who He said He is, can be saved. The point is, Jesus came to save people out of condemnation. Is it important for people to understand the link between their condemnation and the salvation Jesus offers? Yes. But, our commission wasn’t to condemn people’s sin. In being Jesus’ witnesses to a dying world, we’re to address their unbelief of Him, that is their primary sin. Conviction, not condemnation, for any other sin is the job of the Holy Spirit.

We can’t be hell fear mongers and hope dealers at the same time.

 Tweet: We can’t be hell fear mongers and hope dealers at the same time. #ApproachGod | http://ctt.ec/ZefcD+

How many people do you think actually turn to Jesus by being told, by a stranger, that they’re a horrible sinner? If you do a quick Google search for statistics you’ll see that the declining numbers in the church suggests that technique works on very few people. What does work is loving and serving people. It’s the reason that Jesus acted and taught the way He did. It’s why He said he came to serve not be served, told us to love your neighbor and your enemy and to pray for your persecutor. It’s why He begged God to forgive those that were crucifying Him. He knew that love was a far better invitation than fear. Oh, and that’s why John said that there is no fear in love. We can’t be hell fear mongers and hope dealers at the same time. When we use Jesus, the cross, or the bible as a means to generate fear in others, you’re not teaching the Gospel.

When it comes to unbelievers, they need to see Christ acted out and active in our life. It’s for that reason that Peter reminds us that we ought to honor Christ in our hearts and be prepared with an answer for the hope that is in us. He was saying that people will see and ask. When that happens, the focus for Christ’s goodness ought to be by the word of our testimony for what He’s done in OUR sin filled life. Then we can talk about how that translates to humankind. It isn’t our responsibility to identify the sin in an unbeliever’s life. 1 Corinthians 5:13 relieves us of that responsibility. For the believer, if we’re in relationship with them, the Gospel is still meant to draw them to God, because we’re still “being saved.” If we’re in community with them, we’re called to loving correction, not chastising condemnation.

A Way to Excuse Your Behavior

I think this gospel is for many Christians, the preferred one. I know that it used to be mine. I used to hinge my entire religious experience on the idea of God’s good grace. Honestly, it was the only reason I walked into church after a weekend of partying and drinking. I had this illusion that I could choose to act however I wanted and God would forgive me. While it is true that God forgives all sin, choosing to sin and expecting forgiveness is actually an abuse of grace and not at all what it means to follow Jesus.

When the religious leaders brought the woman caught in adultery to Jesus, He not only made the point that her condemnation isn’t theirs to deal in, He told her that He doesn’t condemn her, then said “go and sin no more.” After extending His mercy, He offered her grace and expected that if she decided to receive it she would need to stop doing the very thing that landed her at His feet. But, it wasn’t an expectation that she’d simply change her behavior, it was an expectation that His response to her need for love would so impact her heart that it would change her understanding of how that need was to be met.

The Gospel is not our get out of jail free card. The simple fact that you said a prayer (me included) at some youth event when you were 12, doesn’t give you carte blanche to act however you want. Following Jesus is the continued submission to the pressing of the Holy Spirit on your mind and heart. The Gospel played out in your life is the continual acknowledgement of God’s love for you, thorough the daily confession of Jesus, by the repeated submission to the Holy Spirit. The Gospel isn’t meant to provide you with a way to live any way you feel like, it’s meant to provide you with a way to live better than you can imagine and in a way that invites others into the same joy.

A “To Do” List

It just isn’t this. The Gospel isn’t a list of correct ways to behave. It isn’t behavior modification. The message of the Gospel is not “do this, this and this and you can get into heaven.” It’s about heart transformation. It’s the shedding off of the old you and the putting on the new you, through the work of the Holy Spirit. I used the word shedding intentionally. If you’ve ever observed a snake shed it’s skin, then you know it’s a slow process. But, as the old skin comes off, the skin under it is new and so much more vibrant. It’s the same with us. As the Holy Spirit brings conviction in a particular area, we begin the process of shedding it off. It isn’t without difficulty, and sometimes pain, but the new underneath is so much more vibrant. So much so, that it’s actually life-giving; others are moved toward Jesus by the change that the Holy Spirit prompts in us.

If the Gospel is anything close to a “to do” list, there’s only two things on it: Believe and confess. If we believe in our heart that Jesus is Lord and confess with our mouth (and this isn’t just the “sinner’s prayer,” it’s so much more, but also another blog), we’re saved and we can start the process of being saved and living in His kingdom. When we simply make the Gospel a list of ways to behave, we burden ourselves and others with the same thing that Jesus accused the religious leaders, of His day, of doing. We make following Jesus too burdensome and heavy. But, Jesus said that His yoke is easy and His burden if light; so we ought not add anything to that.

What It Is

It’s John 3:16, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” The Gospel turns hearts to loving God, loving our neighbors and loving each other. The Gospel is God’s love poured out, in the person of Jesus, so that we can be with Him. It’s meant to heal the one relationship that matters above all else, so that we can be vehicles for healing others’ relationships with Him. We use the Gospel to introduce people to the One that closes the gap between them and their Father.

*I‘d love to dialogue with you. But, I want to dialogue with you only if you’ve actually read what I said. If you chose to comment, please start your post with “Timey Whimey” Thanks.

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